kewpid.net

If you have lots of free time, are polit­ic­ally inclined and in need of a laugh, I recom­mend this qual­ity pub­lic­a­tion by a self-hating Cana­dian entitled The North­ern Abyss

Scream­ers: The Hunt­ing trailer

(PDF, 992kB).

It’s imme­di­ately obvi­ous that Adam Yoshida is rather right-wing. But that doesn’t even begin to describe the novel. He sounds like a men­o­pausal bitch god­dess on crack. It’s 152 pages of no-holds-barred, non-stop drivel and ste­reo­types about everything and every­one to the left of Genghis Khan. As someone with liber­tarian tend­en­cies, I would usu­ally be more tol­er­ant of this tune­less whinging from the fringes, but the level of pure ideo­lo­gical hatred in North­ern Abyss denies it this simple cour­tesy. I’m half expect­ing that this is really just a clev­erly executed parody.

Right from the start we are dished a big wal­lop­ing of Yoshida’s banal and basal excrement:

We are now enter­ing the final stages of the battle for Canada. Mod­ern Canada is a land of gay mar­riage, drugs, chaos in the streets, mil­it­ary impot­ence, dis­respect for tra­di­tional insti­tu­tions and all of the other vices that are inher­ent in unchecked lib­er­al­ism. In the end, we might just still have enough time to save the coun­try, but theses next few years will be the last chance. Every moment lost drives another nail into the coffin of our once-proud country.

Talk about feck­ing hyperbole.

There are thou­sands ref­er­ences to the usual sus­pects of con­ser­vat­ive obses­sion: ‘the left’, ‘abor­tion’, ‘gay mar­riage’, ‘the left’, what go’s on in people’s bed­rooms, pub­lic broad­cast­ing, drugs, and ‘the left’.

Yoshida makes such a baff­lingly huge point about the superi­or­ity of the USA over Canada, that I’m left won­der­ing why he doesn’t take a drive over the world’s longest undefen­ded bor­der and stay put.

The equi­val­ent of the McDon­alds of polit­ical ana­lysis could be for­given and saved had Yoshida not men­tioned the following:

In the sum­mer of 2003, for example, Global TV pro­duced a show entitled Train 48, a non­sensical piece of garbage with the pro­duc­tion val­ues of a movie pro­duced for a high school Eng­lish class on an iMac. That is what passes for a ���Cana­dian��� pro­duc­tion these days.

A Mac-hater? Why am I not surprised.

All in all, not a book to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force. (Parker)